Valediction sa Hillcrest Analysis

Valediction sa Hillcrest by: Rolando Tinio

Pagkacollect ng Railway Express sa aking things
(Derecho na iyon sa barko while I take the plane),
Inakyat kong muli ang N-311 at dahil dead of winter,
Nakatopcoat at galoshes akong
Nagright turn sa N wing ng mahabang dilim
(Tunnel yatang aabot hanggang Tondo.
Kinapa ko ang switch sa hall.
Sa isang pitik, nagshrink ang imaginary tunnel,
Nagparang ataol.

Or catacomb,
Strangely absolute ang impression
Ng hilera ng mga pintong nagpuprusisyon:
Individual identification, parang mummy causes,
De-nameplate, de-numero, de-hometown address.
Antiseptic ang atmosphere, streamlined yet/
E filing cabinet.

Filing, hindi naman deaths, ha.
Remembrances, oo. Yung medyo malapot
Dahil, alam mo na I’m quitting the place
After two and a half years.
After two and a half years,
Di man nagkatiyempong mag-ugat, ika nga,
Siyempre’y naging attached, parang morning glory’ng
Mahirap mapaknit sa alambreng trellis.

At pagkabukas ko sa kuwarto
Hubo’t hubad na ang mattresses,
Wala nang kutson sa easy chair.
Mga drawer ng bureau’y nakanganga,
Sabay-sabay nag-ooration,
Nagkahiyaan, nabara.

Of course, tuloy ang radiator sa paggaralgal:
Nasa New York na si Bob and the two Allans,
Yung mga quarterbacks across the hall
Pihadong panay sa Des Moines.
Don and Constance aren’t coming back at all.
Gusto ko mang magpaalam—
to whom?
The drapes? the washbowl? sa double-decker
Na pinaikot-ikot namin ni Kandaswamy
To create space, hopeless, talagang impossible.
Of course, tuloy ang radiator sa paglagutok.
And the above silence,
nakakaiyak kung sumagot.)

Bueno, let’s get it over with.
It’s a long walk to the depot.
Tama na ang sophistication- sophistication.

Sa steep incline, pababa sa highway
Where all things level, sabi nga,
There’s a flurry, ang gentle- gentle.
Pagwhoosh-whoosh ng paa ko,
The snow melts right under:

Nagtutubig, parang asukal,
Humuhulas,
Nagsesentimental.

Valediction sa Hillcrest interprets the feeling of identity confusion. He used two languages to explain this dilemma. At first, he is excited to see his first home which is Tondo. But then, he realized he built a memory in Hillcrest also, so he was attached to that place too. I was a bit shocked when it was not revealed if he went back or stay where he is there. He realized that what matters most is the experiences and learning that you would treasure forever.

In this poem, I can agree that it is hard to find that special place where you belong. Most of my time, I’m in Manila but I still go home to Quezon City since it is where my family lives. Although, they are both in Metro Manila, I must say they are two differerent environments. Manila taught me the tough life while Quezon City was my comfort zone. This poem made me realize that sooner or later I might not stay in both places. I might choose to go to Davao or as far as France. What is important is I grow as a person live the life that I want. And so, I m ready to go to places never expected to be in.

PS: I have a blossoming love for Rolando Tinio hihi